"The 60 to 90 seconds of orgasm is the only part that feels good. The rest – withdrawing the money from a cashpoint, handing it to someone else, pumping a drug-addicted, Marlboro-reeking twentysomething who couldn’t be less interested in me, the walk of shame, the residual condom smell, the distraction of regret, the three or four days of beating up on myself, sneaking in the shower so my wife doesn’t smell the rubber, smoke, hairspray, or cheesy perfume – is hell."
